Dating my ex boyfriend

It starts with loving yourself, being honest to yourself and having enough confidence in yourself.When you are honest with yourself, you’re able to be honest with others.Look outside the box and see if the two of you can agree on the important stuff and let the small stuff take care of themselves. On other issues, you will have to ask him or her to do something that will bring a calmer perspective to the situation as well as new ideas.If you want him or her to do something and he or she is resisting, ask him or her to try it for a limited time, such as a week, and then evaluate the situation.

But if you courageously stand up and honestly say “This is my mistake and I am responsible” even if only privately to yourself, you begin to see a way forward instead of being stuck in the past.As a general rule of thumb, if they haven’t responded to your attempts at making contact after three to four tries and you know they have access to phones, email and the internet, let it go and stop trying.They might well surprise you –better to be pleasantly surprised than disappointed and devastated because you acted out of neediness and desperation.5.The very experience of breaking-up changes who you are, who you think the other is and how you see reality.Because you are no longer the same people, look at this experience as two new people, starting a new relationship together.Just being fully present and attentively listening to him or her and what is really going on in his or her life– feelings, needs, secrets, hopes, fears, embarrassments, expectations — and then asking the impact of events such as how they felt when a certain thing happened provides the safety and reassurance needed to create emotional intimacy.By doing this, the other person feels seen, heard, validated and cared for.7.Dating your ex again isn’t the same as dating someone new.You have a romantic history together and that changes the whole dynamics of approaching, asking for a date and entering into a relationship.When you are confident and self-assured, you’re able to be assertive with people without being needy, pushy or aggressive.3.Take responsibility for your part in the break-up and learn from your mistakes Whether you admit it or not you contributed to the problems in the relationship in some small or large way, so own up and accept your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way.

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